The strange game of money and emotions

“Show me the moneyyy”!!

Some of you may remember this famous line from the Hollywood flick, Jerry Maguire. Money and emotions share a strange bond. People tend to weave a rather ‘uncomfortably comfortable’ arrangement with money when it comes to personal relationships. The long going debate of whether money is important or the emotions has been around across the civilizations from the centuries. We can go back to the time frame of kings and queens and tie the correlation to the present day existence. Emotions are important, but money plays a rather chunky role in the direction they are treaded.

Money and Relationships

It’s all about growing financial independence in the modern times. Blame it on the changing lifestyle scenario or the progressing tide of leap across the industries. Men and women mould their behavioural pattern, largely around what they earn and spend. For example, a single income family will see one partner constantly putting the other down in several matters of decision making. This is a pre-programmed way of reacting and creating the attribute of ‘self-worth’, where the earning partner conveys a simple message to the ‘non-earner’ that he or she is in charge. When it comes to both the partners earning substantially, women often tend to feel perpetually ‘let down’. Multi-tasking, taking care of all the errands while earning in equal measure, women tend to feel that they are not appreciated enough.

Great sense of Power and Identity

Despite all the possible vices with respect to emotions, money is always a sense of high. Money instils a sense of power and control for the families who are well sustained. It also creates a better sense of identity and worthiness to both the partners. Lack of enough money to pull things through ends up causing friction, low self-esteem and even depression. This is very common with working women who go on a sabbatical to take care of children. Being financially independent throughout, asking for money from the partner out of nowhere makes them feel less mortal. This arrangement often gives rise to constant altercations. The same can be said of men who lose their jobs suddenly and have to depend on their partners. They do not like it, cannot avert it, and that gets converted into egoistic differences.

Money is not the culprit, the human approach is

Surprisingly, human nature is heavily responsible for making money play a significant role. There are individuals who are completely driven with the money factor in their life – they are elated when money is continuously flowing in, and they sink when the money sinks. There are the other happy souls too, who can do without too much money or manage with a little money coming in. Interestingly, people who think that money is in their control fare better with success and earning more money. People who are always running behind making money seldom get there.

Being intelligent about money MATTERS

Everything depends on analysing what money means to you and what the approach should be while balancing other aspects of life. People who keep their mind in control and treat money ‘objectively’, deigning to face any kind of outcome usually win. They don’t have money controlling any aspect of their life. Instead, they use the intelligence surrounding making money and generate more wealth.

Control the way money IMPACTS Your Attitude

It is critically important to ‘keep money in its place’. Having a lot or none of it should ideally not change who you are. There are common instances when too much money makes people arrogant and shallow, and too little causes inferiority to set in. People who stay balanced in all the scenarios of money generation set the tone of balance. They end up generating more money and elevating relationships too.

While making money, it is important to create right expectations within one’s own mind – what this really means to an individual in a greater context. Money is important, it gives an impeccable sense of independence and control. Differences arise only when money becomes a deciding factor of your life in totality.

About the author

Deepa Balasubramanian

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